Kicking off this post with a bit of career soul-searching – if you’ve been keeping up with my blog, you’ve probably picked up on my job dilemma. I genuinely enjoy the work and the subject matter is right up my alley. Yet, there’s a part of me that could totally do without the stress and the sky-high expectations, and I’m not just talking about the quality of work. I’m in an industry where everyone’s expected to gun for that high-flying career and hustle up the corporate ladder. If you’re not on that track, folks assume something’s off, which isn’t the case at all. We’ve all got our own paths, right? For me, it’s been a bit of an accidental climb to a place of significance in a job I’m not even sure I love.
You might be asking, how did I land in this high-stakes job? Trust me, I’m wondering the same. 😉 It’s kind of hilarious, really – back when I wrapped up my bachelor’s degree, I was the first to declare I’d never be that corporate climber, working for some massive company that sees you as just another cog in the profit machine. Yet, here I am, smack in the middle of that world.
I’m genuinely grateful for the opportunities I’ve had and the rapid progress I’ve made in my career – don’t get me wrong. But something’s shifted lately; I find myself longing for some quiet and calm. I’ve got a hunch about why I’m feeling this way. Ever since I started this job nearly four years ago, we’ve struggled to find people who are truly into what we do. Now, with folks leaving and no new hires in sight, the rest of us are left to shoulder the growing workload. Trust me, my entire team is stretched thin. We’ve tried voicing our concerns to the higher-ups, but it’s like we’re talking to a wall. They seem indifferent, as long as the profits roll in and their bonuses are secure. It’s frustrating, to say the least.
This isn’t meant to be a rant about my company – I’m well aware that it’s a common story in big corporations. I’m just here, typing away, trying to work out my next move. Being real with myself, I’ve noticed that the mere thought of returning to the office after time off sends my anxiety through the roof. And let’s be honest, that’s not a good sign if your job is supposed to be fulfilling, right? As you might know, I’ve been feeling like my chapter in Switzerland is closing, and I see my future unfolding here in Korea, where I’m currently writing to you. To put it bluntly, as I recently confided to a friend, the idea of going back to Switzerland and my current job fills me with dread. It’s like anticipating a flu you know is coming. This time around, the feeling hit me harder than ever – I lost my appetite and nearly broke down in tears, not just over the job but also at the thought of leaving Korea, a place I’ve grown to love deeply.
The big question I’m wrestling with is whether I should cling to my current job until I’m set to jet off to a new country, or if I’ve got the guts to quit and chase what makes me happy. Right now, a fat paycheck and a swanky title don’t mean much to me – that was never the dream. I’m after a job that lights a spark in me, one that makes mornings a bit brighter and offers the flexibility I crave, both in hours and location. After all, shouldn’t we all get to feel that kind of joy?
You know, folks often tell me I’m the champion of putting mental health and well-being first for others, but why do I find it so tough to take my own advice?
matcha latte on a rainy night 